Personal Development Guide for Surrogate Mothers

Working on your personal development can be confusing to begin with as a surrogate mother. This article was put together for surrogate mothers to guide them in enhancing their personal well being. Here, you’ll find great ideas that are easy to apply and will surely help you become a better surrogate mother.

As a surrogate mother, make friends with those who are positive-minded and will bring joy to your life. They’ll help you stay on track with their good behaviors. You’ll find yourself neutralizing any pessimistic energy you get from people who aren’t as supportive of your self-improvement goals in no time at all.

Show humility and kindness. This will give you the opportunity to think of others and strengthen your relationship with people who care about you. An added benefit of this is that you will find yourself with a larger support group whom you can also help when needed.

Keep a journal with you so whenever an idea strikes, you can write it down. This is such a good idea for surrogate mothers as this will allow you to keep track of changes or moods that you might want to jot down. Bring  a notebook with you when you go out. Write down your idea in detail, and then go back to it at a later time when you can broaden on the issue.

Be active and exercise. Exercising is not just for people who want to lose weight; it is also for those who want to feel good about themselves. There are many physiological advantages associated with exercise, especially as a surrogate. Not only does it keep your body in good shape, but it also causes your body to release chemicals that will boost your happiness levels.

Learn to take it easy and make use of breaks. Taking regular breaks is good because it gives you the chance to recharge your mind, so when you resume work, you’ll be able to get more done.

Finally, appreciate what you have and don’t over complicate life. Doing so will cause you to experience unnecessary stress, which is never good for a surrogate mother. Do not focus on what you may have lost, but look at what is to come in life.

Tips for Gestational Carriers

Now that you are eating for two you have to turn your incorrect food choices into wholesome filling foods. Let the following tips guide and inspire you in this course of your life as a gestational carrier.

As a gestational carrier, it is best to watch what you eat to ensure you and the baby’s overall nutrition. Transforming your eating plan might seem like a hard thing to do, but will give you long term benefits. Nourishing meals will certainly provide your body all the nutrients needed to support the growing baby.

Keep fruits and vegetables a part of your diet. Eating fresh fruits and vegetables is the best, but may be difficult to stock at times as they spoil quickly. Given this, you can opt to buy frozen veggies and sliced fruits instead. Having these in supply will help you stay away from bad food choices from convenience stores and fast food joints.

Be sure to get food that is packed with nutrients and are easy to digest. This can be found in fruits like Avocados which has lots of healthy fats and is fairly easy on a delicate stomach. Vegetables like spinach and kale are great super foods which can easily give your body vitamins and B supplements, both of which are favorable for you as a gestational carrier as well as the little one that you are carrying.

Another great snack would be nuts. Consuming nuts in small amounts is ideal as majority of nuts supply healthy protein, one of the toughest good nutrients to acquire while consuming healthy and balanced diet.

As a gestational carrier, a well balanced diet is the key in keeping great overall health, along with physical exercise. A little bit of everything may also do well not just for your appetite, but also for the baby that you are carrying.

Eating the right kinds of food will leave you feeling better about yourself and will make each day in your life as a gestational carrier a little more memorable.

Top Concerns on Surrogacy

What does Surrogacy mean?

Not all of us are blessed with the ability to procreate. This is evident with infertile couples and gay partners who need help in starting their own family. Thanks to science, there is now a way to make this dream a reality.

IVF or In vitro fertilization is the process of fertilizing an egg outside the human body. If the female is incapable of carrying the fertilized egg (embryo) to term, surrogacy can make this happen. In this regard, surrogacy can be defined as the process by which a couple (intended parents) goes into contract with another woman (surrogate) to carry their fertilized egg.

Exactly what is the price for surrogacy?

This procedure definitely comes with a hefty price tag. It is in fact very expensive to go through this procedure. The chunk of the expense comes from the numerous medical examinations and medications, as well as the payment for the Surrogate’s services. Comparing fees among Surrogate agencies is ideal to get a good start in financing for this process. There is also fertility Financing offered in many states where this procedure is largely practiced and accepted.

Is Surrogacy Legal?

It is legal in some states such as California, Oregon and Illinois. This makes it possible for couples to have children and achieve their hopes of building a family. On the other hand, other states such as New Jersey and New York, have contrasting views on the process.

Is there a connection between the surrogate and the child?

There are two types of surrogacy. One is called “gestational surrogacy,” wherein the surrogate just serves as a carrier for the baby and is in no way associated with the genetics that create the fertilized egg. Then there is traditional surrogacy, which uses the surrogate’s egg and the sperm of the male donor to create an embryo. In this case, the surrogate has her genes in the embryo.

Are there instances that a surrogate claims the infant as hers?

To ensure that a Surrogate goes through with the process according to plan, she will have to undergo a series of stringent physical and psychological tests. These exams assess a Surrogate’s overall capacity to carry and then turn over the child to its rightful parents. Furthermore, a legal document is signed and agreed upon in the presence of a legal representative to safeguard the interests of all parties involved,

Surrogate Compensation

Surrogate Compensation

A surrogate’s payment is rarely the top concern, however the correct compensation is due to them seeing that they have already sacrificed a great deal, physically and emotionally, in order to bring someone else’s child into the world.

Surrogate Compensation: Fees for Services

Surrogacy charges deviate from company to company. The typical application fee will run upwards of around $500, while legal expenses get to around $15,000 for the intended parents. The said costs do not go straight to surrogate mom; these funds go into making certain that she as well as intended moms and dads are shielded financially.

Surrogate Compensation: Surrogate Charge

Becoming a surrogate is a full time commitment. It is similar to an employee hired for a full time job. With this in mind, intended parents commonly compensate the surrogate with a cash fee. This is predetermined in the contract before the pregnancy and ensures that payment for medical and other expenses are covered.

On the average, a first time surrogate earns from $25,000 to $35,000. A surrogate veteran obviously earns much higher compared to a surrogate newbie.

Surrogate Compensation: Various Other Costs Involved

As talked about previously, a surrogate mother’s clinical expenditures are actually paid by the intended parents. This not only covers payment for medical checkups like ob gyn appointments, but as well as, other expenses that may arise from unusual circumstances that affects the surrogate mother’s well being. An example of this would be if the surrogate gets evicted from her property. A back-up plan will be accessible to keep her lifestyle protected.

Your Top 5 Surrogacy Questions Answered

Your Top 5 Surrogacy Questions Answered

Surrogacy can be a challenging process to comprehend. There are many aspects to this process that need to be understood. As intended parents, you need to know as much information as possible to ensure a hassle free surrogacy. If you happen to be new to surrogacy, here are the top questions and answers:

Top Question 1: What are the types of women that become surrogates?
Generally, surrogate mothers would have to be between 18 to 38 years old. This is one of the most important requirements surrogacy agencies and intended parents look for in a surrogate mother. Another important characteristic is that the surrogate mother should have at least conceived one child to ensure that the surrogate mother can carry pregnancy to term. Finally, the surrogate mother’s top goal should be helping others rather than the monetary compensation involved with surrogacy. In most cases, surrogacy agencies conduct a screening process on surrogate mothers to assure intended parents that they are getting a well-suited surrogate mother. Surrogacy agencies check medical records, financial history and criminal records of surrogate mothers.

Top Question 2: What do Intended Parents look for in a surrogate?
Intended parents normally base their decision on several factors like location of the surrogate mother, level of responsibility, intelligence, health and ability to carry a healthy pregnancy. These are some of the main characteristics that intended parents look for in a surrogate mother. Then there are those intended parents that are very meticulous when choosing a surrogate mother. These intended parents need a surrogate who is in agreement with the level of communication they prefer and someone who agrees to their type and style of relationship during and after the surrogacy. They prefer a surrogate who is not only physically and mentally in line with their expectations but also emotionally.

Top Question 3: Is the surrogate mother properly screened?
It depends. If the referral is coming from an IVF clinic then maybe not, as they generally do not perform the same amount of screening as surrogacy agencies will. If the referral for a surrogate mother comes from a reliable surrogacy agency then the surrogate has passed several mental, emotional and physical screening processes. Surrogacy agencies check medical records from previous pregnancies and conduct psychological and emotional tests on the surrogate mother. If the surrogate is married, her husband will also undergo psychological and medical screening

Top Question 4: Will the Intended Parents and surrogate meet?
It depends on the preference of the intended parents. There are intended parents that prefer not to get emotionally involved with their surrogate. The majority of intended parents however, prefer the “open surrogacy” policy, which means that the intended parents would meet and get to know the surrogate. Meeting the surrogate reassures intended parents that the surrogate’s primary motivation is not the money she earns but rather her desire to help. If the surrogate and the intended parents meet, they can get to know each other and get a better idea if the arrangement will work out.

Top Question 5: As Intended Parents, what are the chances of a successful surrogacy?
In medical terms, a “successful” surrogacy simply means that intended parents end up with a biological child. Since surrogacy involves a complex process like In Vitro Fertilization, the success rate will greatly depend on several factors like the health of the intended parents’ sperm and eggs, ability of the surrogate mother to carry a child to term and health of the surrogate. With these factors taken into consideration, the overall success rate of surrogacy in the US ranges from 70 to 80 percent. Your fertility doctor can give you the rate of success on your surrogacy.

Getting a better understanding of surrogacy before you begin your journey will definitely help you have a successful surrogacy, and understanding these top 5 questions on surrogacy will help you decide on the right thing to do before you start on this very important process. Surrogacy agencies can stand by your side and make the journey a lot easier because they can give you a better idea of what to expect and guide you throughout the whole process.

Your Next Step

To find the surrogate mother that’s right for you and your family, simply fill out our easy free online application and a Illinois Surrogate Agency caseworker will contact you to discuss your application, answer any questions you might have, and outline the next steps. And in the meantime, you can also download our free reports to get even more information on surrogacy and the surrogate experience.

Baby Shower Ideas for Intended Parents

Baby Shower Ideas for Intended Parents

Intended parents can find it difficult and confusing to throw a baby shower, since questions like ‘Should we invite the surrogate mother?’ and ‘How do we tell our families and friends about this occasion?’ can arise.

And since surrogacy is a relatively new process, there’s no established tradition in how to throw a baby shower. So to help get you started in planning the perfect baby shower as intended parents, here are some ideas:

If you’re planning a baby shower, consider inviting the surrogate mother – if you have a close relationship with her. If your relationship with her is more on the ‘professional’ level, it might not be so appropriate to invite her – after all, you don’t have a close or a personal relationship.

If you do have a close relationship with her, consider including her name on the invites you send out. It might read something like: “You are invited to attend a baby shower of (baby’s name), Proud parents to be (your names), proud surrogate mother (her name.)

If you invite your surrogate mother to the baby shower, it’s a good idea to suggest that your other guests bring her some small gifts, so that she doesn’t feel left out of the party. Small tokens are just fine – the important thing to remember is to credit her, to make her feel appreciated for all her efforts.

If your relationship with the surrogate mother is close, inviting her to the baby shower is a really good idea; she’ll feel touched to be recognized in this way, and the baby shower may become a treasured memory for her, a highlight of the surrogacy experience.

On the other hand, if your relationship isn’t especially close, and it would therefore be awkward to invite her, you could instead consider throwing her a surprise party after giving birth, or simply give her some presents as a token of gratitude for her contribution to your family.

Your Next Step

To find the surrogate mother that’s right for you and your family, simply fill out our easy free online application and a Illinois Surrogate Agency caseworker will contact you to discuss your application, answer any questions you might have, and outline the next steps. And in the meantime, you can also download our free reports to get even more information on surrogacy and the surrogate experience.

Surrogacy Contracts: 3 Helpful Tips Every Intended Parent Should Know

Surrogacy Contracts: 3 Helpful Tips Every Intended Parent Should Know

Intended parents can face a lot of confusion regarding the legal aspects of surrogacy, and one of the biggest sources of confusion in the surrogacy process is the surrogacy contract. The surrogacy contract refers to the legal agreement between the intended parents and the surrogate. The contract lists all legal provisions and agreements related to the process of surrogacy. Having a legal contract between a surrogate and the intended parents is very important to avoid any future legal conflicts. In the event of unforeseen circumstances, the surrogacy contract will act as a legal guide for both intended parents and the surrogate.

In order to get a better understanding of surrogacy contracts, here are 3 of the most important things every intended parent should know:

Tip 1. Surrogacy contracts differ from state to state.
Every state recognizes surrogacy as a reproductive option, but while some states have passed laws and statutes defining the surrogacy process, others do not have specific laws addressing surrogacy. In most states where surrogacy is recognized, there are laws and statutes that define the paternity of the child, the financial obligations and the rights of the intended parents and the surrogate. It is very important to know what the local laws and statutes are before getting into any legal contract with a surrogate. Reproductive specialty lawyers who specialize in surrogacy can help intended parents better understand all the different laws and statutes on surrogacy. Surrogate agencies will employ reproductive specialty lawyers for intended parents and surrogates in order to ensure that each party is legally protected.

Tip 2. The surrogacy contract is essential.
The surrogacy contract is very important to avoid any future legal conflicts that may arise during the process of surrogacy. A surrogacy contract is a binding and enforceable legal contract for the intended parents and surrogate. It pre-defines the paternity of the child and both the financial and behavioral responsibilities of each party. The surrogacy contract allows each party (meaning the intended parents and the surrogate) to state their own intentions and responsibilities to one another, and it establishes guidelines for what actions will be taken in the event of medical complications such as the number of embryos to be transferred at one time, if selective reduction is an acceptable option, and which type of delivery method will be used. All of these agreements and conditions are very important to avoid any legal conflicts that may arise during and after the surrogacy process. Surrogate agencies can provide helpful information on the different aspects included in a surrogacy contract.

Tip 3. The surrogacy contract should be reviewed by reproductive specialty lawyers representing each party.
Neither the intended parents nor the surrogate are required by law to use a reproductive specialty lawyer’s services for the surrogacy contract. However, it is highly advisable that the surrogacy contract be reviewed by a reproductive specialty lawyer in order to be certain that the child’s paternity is pre-established, and to properly identify the financial and medical obligations of each party. It is also recommended that both the surrogate and the intended parents have their own reproductive specialty lawyers review the surrogacy contract. Each reproductive specialty lawyer will review the surrogacy contract to ensure that the client’s responsibilities, rights, and paternity are properly identified. In most cases, surrogate agencies will provide both the intended parents and the surrogate with their own reproductive specialty lawyer.

The surrogate process can be confusing for intended parents, and reviewing and understanding the surrogacy contract is one of the best ways to clear up that confusion. The structure and clarity the surrogacy contract provides can help intended parents to feel comfortable and confident throughout the surrogate process.

Your Next Step

To find the surrogate mother that’s right for you and your family, simply fill out our easy free online application and a California Surrogate Agency caseworker will contact you to discuss your application, answer any questions you might have, and outline the next steps. And in the meantime, you can also download our free reports to get even more information on surrogacy and the surrogate experience.

Intended Parents 101: Preparing for the Arrival of Your Baby

Intended Parents 101: Preparing for the Arrival of Your Baby

Fortunately, the nine months between your baby’s conception and arrival gives you plenty of time to prepare. Here are some important tips to help you get ready for the arrival of your new baby:

Learn about the birth process with your surrogate
Because the thought of birth can be very overwhelming (even to an experienced surrogate mother), it’s best to discuss the details with her.

Find a doctor for your surrogate and baby
The best time to find an obstretican is before the fertility treatment starts – during the treatment, things will be hectic. Start looking midway through the surrogate’s pregnancy, around the 4-5 month point. This may seem early, but you’ll want to give yourself plenty of time to find a physician who’ll be a good fit for your family, who accepts your insurance, and who is taking new patients. Ask the people you know for references.

Get on the same page with your surrogate
An important aspect of planning is to inform your surrogate – she should be well informed about the different plans you and your partner have during and after the delivery of the child.

Talk to veteran moms about birth and baby care
Veteran moms have valuable knowledge you can use when your baby comes. They can provide great suggestions and tips on things you need to expect when your child arrives.

Prepare older siblings and pets (if any)
Many parents use a baby doll to help their child understand what’s coming. Older toddlers or pre-schoolers will enjoy the pretend play; when they see you diapering or feeding the new baby later, it will seem familiar. Pets also benefit from special pre-baby preparation. Local trainers may offer classes, or you can turn to books, articles, or videos for tips on teaching your pet and eventually your baby how to respect each other.

Decide who will attend the birth
This is a very personal decision. Some intended parents like a full room while others prefer as few people present as possible. Give some thought to what you want, so that there are no misunderstandings, unwelcome observers, or offended grandmothers. Make sure to also speak about this decision with your surrogate so she will not be surprised at the hospital.

Pack your bag
The last thing you’ll want to worry about when your surrogate goes into labor is whether you have everything packed. Ease your mind by getting your bag together a few weeks before your due date. Important things to bring should include all the legal documents, as well as any gift you may be presenting to your surrogate. Remember, a new baby requires an installed car seat, diapers, wipes, some clothing, and a safe place to sleep.

Your Next Steps

To apply to be a surrogate mother with the Illinois Surrogate Agency, simply fill out our easy online form, and one of our friendly, knowledgeable caseworkers will be in touch with you to discuss your application, talk about the next steps in the process, and answer any questions you may have. In the meantime, you can also check out our free reports for more information on surrogacy and the surrogate experience.

Intended Parents 101

Intended Parents 101: Is Surrogacy Right for Us?

Before you choose to go with surrogacy, you and your spouse or partner need to ask yourselves some questions; it’s a life-changing decision that requires mutual agreement, and it shouldn’t be taken lightly.

Some of the most important questions are:

“How will you handle a surrogate carrying your baby?”
The relationship between the surrogate and the intended parents can be as close or as limited as the parties agree upon, but it’s generally encouraged that the intended parents and surrogate communicate on a daily basis, attend all doctor appointments, and socialize on a regular basis. This allows the intended parents to feel that they are part of the pregnancy and are bonding with the baby.

“How can we be sure we have a compatible surrogate?”
The most critical step in the surrogacy process is selecting a surrogate that closely matches your and your spouse’s values, personality, and beliefs. This is accomplished through the agency that you and your spouse hire; each party will complete a profile that compiles personal information about you and your spouse and the surrogate and her spouse (if she is married). Once a potential match is located and properly screened, the agency will arrange a meeting of all parties.

“How much are we willing to financially invest in trying to have a baby?”
You and your spouse need to research the costs involved in using a surrogate to have a child – they’ll depend upon which medical procedures need to be performed, the agency fees, and the surrogate fees. The surrogacy agency will be able to provide you with an estimated breakdown to help you figure this out.

If you decide to choose surrogacy as a path to having a baby, it’s very important the relationship between both parties be protected. This is accomplished by selecting an agency that is not strictly a matching service – pick one that’s knowledgeable about surrogacy laws in your state, that carefully screens all surrogates, that is willing to act as a mediator between the surrogate and intended parents, ensures all legal and hospital matters are handled, and is available to walk all parties through each step of the process.

Your Next Step

To find the surrogate mother that’s right for you and your family, simply fill out our easy free online application and a Illinois Surrogate Agency caseworker will contact you with you to discuss your application, answer any questions you might have, and outline the next steps. And in the meantime, you can also download our free reports to get even more information on surrogacy and the surrogate experience.

Intended Parents 101

Intended Parents 101: Common Questions Answered

Understandably, intended parents tend to have a lot of questions. Here are three (and their answers!) to get you started:

Why do I need a legal surrogacy agreement?
A legal surrogacy agreement – your surrogacy contract, that is, drafted by a specialized surrogacy attorney – attempts to cover all the “what ifs” in the process, addressing every issue that may arise.

For example, what if the surrogate changes her mind and wants to keep the baby? What if the intended parents split up while the surrogate is pregnant? What if the surrogate is pregnant with multiple fetuses? A well-drafted surrogacy agreement will answer all these questions (and many more), and be clear as to each party’s intent. The agreement should not only cover the important details of the arrangement but also establish each party’s legal rights and address their responsibilities too.

Can I use a ready-made contract I found on the Internet, or create my own?
This is very heavily not-recommended. A surrogacy agreement or contract is more complicated than you may think. The costs you anticipate saving by preparing the agreement yourself do not begin to outweigh the risks or legal consequences for a poorly drafted agreement.

Most of the agreements found on the Internet are too general in nature. Not only do they lack case law as they pertain to your specific surrogacy journey, they almost never provide enough protection for all involved parties or detail the specifics of your surrogacy arrangement.

The best and most practical way to get a well drafted surrogacy contract would be to enlist the help of a reliable surrogate agency that has years of experience and can provide a solid reliable reproductive lawyer.

What is required to ensure I am my child’s legal parent?
So, you have an agreement drafted by a legal professional, you’ve had the transfer, your surrogate is pregnant and you’re a few months away from realizing your dreams! Now what? Besides the decorating, shopping, baby shower and all-around giddiness you feel every day knowing your baby is on the way, you must again return to the legal issues and obtain a judgment of parentage which declares the Intended parent(s) the parent(s) and gives them all legal rights and adjudges that the surrogate and her husband (if any) have no legal rights.

Typically, this judgment is obtained pre-birth. There are some situations where your attorney may suggest that one parent needs to “adopt” the child. When you meet with your attorney, they will advise you on which manner you must proceed. Legally, this is your final step.

Once the judgment is obtained, your attorney will forward a certified copy to the hospital your surrogate will be delivering at and it is always best to keep an additional copy in your hospital bag and then just wait for the glorious day of your child’s birth.

Your Next Step

To find the surrogate mother that’s right for you and your family, simply fill out our easy free online application and a Surrogate Connection Partners caseworker will contact you with you to discuss your application, answer any questions you might have, and outline the next steps. And in the meantime, you can also download our free reports to get even more information on surrogacy and the surrogate experience.