A lot of women considering surrogate motherhood aren’t sure what to expect – learning about other women’s experiences might help them make a better decision.
Several of our surrogate mothers volunteered to share their stories. This is Beth’s.
The Surrogate Mother Journey with Beth
Beth was a 30-year-old single mother whose friend had a wonderful experience as a paid surrogate. After seeing how much her friend enjoyed this – and that she made great money – Beth decided to try it herself. Having spoken with her friend, she went in well-prepared.
“Some acquaintances didn’t understand how I could just ‘give up the baby,’” Beth said, when we asked how the people in her life reacted to her being a surrogate. “I just explained that I could because it wasn’t ‘my baby’ – I was just carrying the intended parents’ baby for them as a favor.”
She explained the pregnancy to her daughter by saying that although she was pregnant, the baby was not hers and wouldn’t be a part of their family.
When it came to her ideal intended parents, Beth’s preferences were quite simple: she wanted them to be loving and responsible people so she could be sure that the baby she was carrying would be loved and cared for. It only took her four months to get matched with the Pattersons, her new intended parents.
Beth and the Pattersons agreed that it would be best to maintain a professional relationship. Beth, highly valuing her privacy, asked that the Pattersons not visit her at home. They were free to call her periodically to check up, though.
They took time from their busy schedule to join her at doctor’s appointments, and were in the delivery room with Beth when she finally gave birth. While she was in the hospital post-delivery, they gave her a care package.
Everyone agreed that Beth would receive periodic updates and pictures of the baby and the family, and the Pattersons asked if they could use Beth as a surrogate again if they should ever want another baby. Beth happily agreed to this.
Following her first experience as a surrogate, Beth does wish she’d done a few things a little differently. “In hindsight, I wish I could have made more of an effort to get to know the Pattersons,” she said. “And I’d like to have kept a video journal to give the Pattersons as a keepsake.”
Some of the money she received as a surrogate was spent as a down payment on a badly-needed new car; the rest went to credit-card bills.
“I’m very glad I made the decision to be a surrogate mother,” Beth said. “I’d definitely recommend it to others, and I’d love to be one again if the chance arises.”
Your Next Steps
To apply to be a surrogate mother with the Illinois Surrogate Agency, simply fill out our easy online form, and one of our friendly, knowledgeable caseworkers will be in touch with you to discuss your application, talk about the next steps in the process, and answer any questions you may have. In the meantime, you can also check out our free reports for more information on surrogacy and the surrogate experience.